Monday, September 05, 2005


looong break. so much to write, so little time...

The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today is Christians, who acknowledge Jesus with their lips and walk out the door, and deny Him by their lifestyle. That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable.
— Brennan Manning

This being said, I find it extremely frustrating and stressful to be a Christian sometimes. I know I need to be an example, but at the same time, I am human too. I have feelings and emotions just like anyone else...I react when I am hurt and angry...I mess up...I'm not perfect...no one is. I don't need to live my life so cautiously that I am afraid to be ME...worried that once I slip up someone is standing by waiting to shake their finger at me. ...

Father please forgive me for I can not compose
The fear that lives within me
Or the rate at which it grows
If struggle has a purpose
On the narrow road you’ve carved
Why do I dread my trespasses will leave a deadly scar?
Do they see the fear in my eyes?
Are they so revealing?
This time I cannot disguise
All the doubt I’m feeling
What if I stumble, what if I fall?
What if I lose my step and I make fools of us all?
Will the love continue when my walk becomes a crawl?
What if I stumble, and what if I fall?...

~"What If I Stumble?" sung by dcTalk~

you
should
know
who
i
am